Her Christmas Wish
by samanddianefan10
Summary: It's Scarlett's first Christmas without Bonnie and Rhett. When she goes to visit her daughter's gravesite, she recieves comfort from a special visitor. Could this be just what she needs to change her life?


It was her first Christmas since Rhett had left her, and Scarlett found herself with nothing but time. This was just a meaningless day without Bonnie and him. Him. That was all she could let herself think, for the mention of his name was forbidden at Tara. For whoever dared breathe that terrible word was met with a icy stare and an even more harsh verbal beating followed by three or four days of the silent treatment. They knew not to mention Rhett Butler, at least not in Scarlett's presence. Oh, they talked of him, all right. They whispered his name in their daily gossip, careful not to let her hear them. Would this be the day he returned? Would he ever forgive the black-hearted mistress of the manor? Or would even the Captain be wise enough to stay away, stay far away from the woman who brought nothing but death and misery wherever she went?

Scarlett was a smart woman; she knew people talked about her. If she cared she never showed it. And if she even cared one bit she never would have survived one day in her life, so the musings of helpless hands didn't bother her in the least. Let them talk. Had they walked a day in her shoes, she wondered, what would they have done? They most likely would have starved to death, and what good would that have done anyone? Silly fools. Scarlett knew deep down that she was no better than they were, for she had lost everything that had ever mattered to her, but she still had her pride, and for that, she could still pretend that she didn't care about him. And if she pretended long enough then maybe, just maybe, her heart wouldn't skip a beat whenever she heard a carriage pull up to the house.

As she dressed for the day Scarlett opened her dresser; gone was the picture of Ashley that had once torn apart the very foundation that she now longed for more than anything in the world. In its place was a photograph of Rhett and Bonnie. Bonnie. Here was Scarlett dressed in her best and Bonnie was all alone, on Christmas too. Even Scarlett wasn't that coldhearted where she could see to that. On one hand, it was too depressing to think about; maybe she would busy herself around Tara. But everyone would just sit around and feel sorry for her, and that's the last thing she wanted, so she knew what she had to do. Maybe seeing Bonnie would be good for her. She hadn't seen her since that awful day- the day that no one dare speak off- so perhaps this might do her some good.

00000

After sending away her driver, she slowly made her way to the place she had been dreading- her daughter's grave. It was simple but Scarlett knew that it was Bonnie's, and at first she turned her head. Why was she here? She hated death more than anything in the world. Scarlett knew that she didn't come here to say goodbye to Bonnie- that was too depressing and goodbyes were for adults-she knew that better than anyone. So what really brought her here? There were so many memories, not all of them bad. Sometimes when she started to think of Bonnie all she could think of was Rhett and how much it had hurt that he loved his daughter more than he loved his own wife, and of course there was the pain of his leaving. But there were good times too. Like their honeymoon- Scarlett couldn't remember ever being that happy. Oh, the places he had shown her! And the food! Why, she was afraid she was going to go home as big as Mammy but she didn't care! Everything looked and tasted so wonderful. She didn't have a care in the world, not until nightfall, and then he was there, and the whole world was right again.

Him. Why did everything keep coming back to him? It had been a long time since she had seen him, and for all Scarlett knew Rhett could be dead, or worse, living with another woman. She knew he wasn't the kind of man who liked to wait around, he had told her so himself. Just the very thought made her feel ill to her stomach. Oh, she had been such a fool. She hated Ashley and she hated Rhett but she hated herself most of all for loving Rhett the way she did. She was a girl when she loved Ashley, but was a woman with Rhett, only she hadn't realized it until it was too late. And now she was all alone, and it was her own fault. And if there was one thing Scarlett couldn't stand, it was knowing that she was to blame for something, especially matters of the heart.

So she kneeled down to the ground, and lowered her head, and thoughts of the past flooded her mind almost to the point where she couldn't take any more. After a few moments of this she was disturbed from her thoughts by a very familiar voice.

"Taking to prayer are we? Isn't it a little late to join a convent?"

Stunned, Scarlett slowly turned around, trying to convince herself that this wasn't a dream. She wanted to run to him, but knowing, like a horse, it would only startle him and cause him to run, she simply straightened herself out and raised an eyebrow. "Merry…Merry Christmas Rhett."

"And Merry Christmas to you, my dear Scarlett. I see that you've taken to wearing the traditional mourning garb. Might I presume that this has something to do with our daughter?"

"Oh Rhett, you know it does! It's Christmas and I couldn't stand to think of her all by herself out here and I'm so glad you're here too. Never mind the fact that you hate and despise me. She doesn't have to be alone today of all days!"

"So you're here out of guilt?"

Scarlett looked at him. "Well, partly. I haven't come here as often as I should. But that doesn't mean anything. Just because you're not with someone doesn't mean that you don't care."

Rhett smirked, amused. "Quite the philosopher, aren't we? I never knew you to try to tackle the larger meaning of life. I must say that it suits you."

"You're making fun of me, and on a holiday too. Well you can just go back to where you came from as far as I'm concerned. You're no better than I am. You just disappeared and I bet that you haven't even seen Bonnie either," Scarlett pouted.

Rhett grew very serious. "Scarlett, it's very rare that I tell you when you're right, but in this case, I have to say that it's true. I haven't been out to see Bonnie. The reasons are of no importance to you, but I intend to right this wrong. I am making a promise to my daughter that I will be out to see her on a regular basis. I may lie to most everyone I meet , but I have never lied to my daughter. You can count on me."

"Does that mean…"

"Don't get your hopes up Scarlett. I'm not making a marriage proposal or even a suggestion of a kiss. I'm saying that I'm back in town, for whatever that's worth."

"Oh, Rhett, I knew you'd come back. I always knew it," she grinned and then wrapped her arms around him . He didn't embrace her in return, but he didn't fight her either. Maybe it was the holidays, maybe it was the sacrament of being near to their daughter, but God help him he missed Scarlett. There was something about that woman that drove a man to distraction. Just as he would always love Bonnie, he knew then that he would always love Scarlett; whether or not he would let himself get close to her was another question. But for that Christmas, for that moment, they had each other, and that was good enough for the both of them.

The end


End file.
